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Posted in You vs celebrities boxing on 2017-05-29 08:27:56

Wearing this: http://cdn04.cdn.justjared.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/perry-vmasperf/katy-perry-roar-vmas-performance-watch-now-04.jpg

We touch gloves and Katy winks at me. "Hope you're ready to lose big boy." I respond "Hope you're ready to get $%!@ed." She responds, mockingly, "Oooh, is that a promise?"

Round 1 Katy and I both come out tepidly. We throw feints but neither makes any kind of definitive move. At the 2:30 mark I try to bully Katy into the corner, but she reverses it and traps me. She starts throwing left and rights, and though I'm able to block most of them, she's able to slip one past my guard and into my face. As the bell rings Katy backs off, laughing.

Round 2 Katy comes out with a gleam in her eye. She starts throwing jabs into my guard. I keep my distance looking for an opening. She keeps moving side to side in front of me occasionally throwing jabs. Katy feints to my left and as I move to block throws a cross into my face. As I reel back she presses on hitting me twice more in my face. When she goes for the third one I plant my feet and beat her to the punch slamming a vicious left cross into her face. Katy nearly goes down as she stumbles away from me. Katy regains her footing but can't reestablish her guard and I'm able to press forward and start throwing straights into her face and chest. She's pushed back against the ropes and I start laying into her. She manages to guard her face but she's still rocked by my onslaught. The bell rings and I disengage. Katy looks $%!@ed as I back off.

Round 3 Katy's a lot more cautious this time and we're back to throwing jabs and feints at each other. Katy overextends on a jab allowing me to get an uppercut to her chin. I follow up with two jabs to her face. She tries to get away but I keep chasing her, sending clubbing blows into her guard. All she can do is try and stay up and get her block up right before I knock it away again. Katy's finally too slow and a beautiful right cross smacks her right in the face. With a grunt she stumbles into the ropes and goes down. The ref gets to 6 before Katy gets up. The bell rings a few seconds after we resume.

Round 4 I come out a lot more aggressively than before. I immediately start jabbing Katy. Her guard is slipping and a few shots get to her face. Katy throws a desperate haymaker but I slip in an uppercut right into her midsection. She grunts and stumbles back. I get her into the corner and start wailing on her midsection. Blow after blow pounds into the sides of her tummy. Katy desperately clinches to save herself, but I muscle her arm out of the way and start using my right to send more shots into her body. The clinch becomes a trap as I pound her where all she can do is take it. The ref breaks us up and we resume. Katy's guard is low to protect her ribs. It allows me to smack her straight in the face. A 1-2 combo is followed up with a big haymaker that sends Katy spinning to the mat. She's near the ropes and struggles to reach them as the ref begins to count. When he gets to 8, the bell rings. Katy was nowhere near getting to her feet but was saved by the bell.

Round 5 Katy comes out sluggish and slow. I come out still relatively fresh. I waste no time and hit her with a right cross across the face. I proceed to batter her around the ring. Her guard is basically nonexistent and I deliberately pull my punches so that she doesn't go down. Katy is hit into the ropes and I slam vicious punches into her left side. She tries to clinch, but I block her and uppercut her on the chin instead. She's on the ropes again with her hands barely up and a glassy look in her eyes. I wind up for a huge punch with my right but fake her out and jab with my left. She stumbles away and I let her go. Katy plants her feet and I go over to face her. She winds up in an obvious way and takes a pathetic swing at me. I swat it away and start swinging at her. Punch after punch goes into her face and chest. Her guard disintegrates and she just takes it. I punch her into the ropes and just keep smacking her back and forth. Finally I stop. Katy has involuntarily supported herself on the ropes. She's nearly out of it, but she has enough wherewithal to look at me as I wind up for the final punch. A massive haymaker snaps her face to the side and she drops down to the mat. She never moves during the ten count. Once she's counted out I go over to her prone form, kick her onto her back and place my foot on her breasts. I raise my glove in triumph over the downed form of Katy Perry.

Posted in male vs female celebrities on 2017-05-27 19:06:43

Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson: Black shorts and boots.

Scarlett Johanssen: A green, shiny, midriff baring athletic top, matching short shorts, and black wrestling boots.

The Rock gets on the mic and makes fun of the diminutive blonde, wondering how she could possibly believe that she could beat the Brahma Bull. When his back turns, Scarlett rushes him and begins clubbing him in the back with forearms. She manages to get him into the corner where the Rock gets between the ropes forcing the break up.

They meet again in the center of the ring. Rock tries to go for a collar and elbow but Scarlett kicks him in the stomach instead. She rebounds off of the ropes and goes for a dropkick, but the Rock gets up and swats down to the mat. As she scrambles to get up, Rock grabs her by her hair and taunts her. Then he powerslams her with authority to the mat. Scarlet gasps as the air is driven out of her and her whole body feels the impact.

Rock grabs her by her arm and leg and places his foot into her side and starts stretching her out. Scarlet takes it as she looks for a way out. But instead the Rock releases the hold and gets to his feet. He grabs her by her hair and hauls her to her feet. Rock Irish Whips her into the ropes and then runs into the opposite ropes. He runs at full speed as an out of control Scarlett runs towards him. He hits her with a clothesline that causes the short blonde to do a 360 degree flip in the air before slamming onto the mat in the middle of the ring. Scarlett just lays there barely conscious as the Rock struts around the ring, gloating. Then he stops at her head and looks to the audience. They start cheering as he takes off his elbow pad in as dramatic a fashion as possible. The Rock goes through all of the motions to perform the famous People's Elbow. But just as he goes down to do it, Scarlett rolls out of the way, and his unprotected elbow hits the mat.

Scarlett scrambles as the Rock writhes in pain and manages to cinch in a headscissors. The Rock thrashes around as Scarlett's thighs squeeze his head and neck tighter. The Rock's thrashing gets less and less, but he's able to drag the smaller woman closer to the ropes. Just when it looks like the Rock might pass out, he gets his foot on the ropes, forcing a break. Scarlet squeezes a little more until the ref gets her off of her opponent. As Scarlett stands she roars to the crowd, who cheer back. She slowly climbs the ropes as the Rock stirs and slowly gets to his feet. She perches herself on the top rope and waits for the Rock. As he gets to his feet and turns around, Scarlett launches herself for the double axe handle. But the Rock catches Scarlett underneath her arm and steadies her. A look or pure fear goes across Scarlett's face and the audience cheers louder than before as they know what's coming.

The Rock hauls her up and slams her to the ground with authority. ROCK BOTTOM on Scarlett as she lays there sputtering and coughing. The Rock doesn't waste time and drags her by her legs to the center of the ring. The audience picks up again as Rock again prepares the People's Elbow. This time there's nothing Scarlett can do and the move connects with her pretty forehead, causing her entire body to jerk involuntarily off of the mat. The Rock wastes no time and quickly pins her for the 3 count, not even bothering to hook the leg. The ref makes the academic 1-2-3 as the Rock is announced as the winner.

The Rock gently helps Scarlett to her feet. She's clearly still dazed as he helps her out, but when she sees the genuine smile on his face she focuses a bit. He tells her that she was a lot better than expected and offers to shake her hand. Scarlett smiles as she tepidly reaches out her hand to clasp his. But just as she does Rock pulls her forward and kicks her in the stomach.

Scarlett goes down to one knee as the Rock gets behind her, grabs her by the hair and throws her out of the ring. She tumbles down to the floor and the Rock follows. She has her hands up as she begs and pleads for him to stop. The Rock yells at her, "You wanna play with the big boys, bitch,"and then grabs her by her arms, pulls her up, grabs her around the stomach and charges her spine first into the ring post. Scarlett screams in pain as her back hits steel. She stumbles away and leans on to the ring barrier holding her back. Rock goes back to the announcer table and gets a chair. The ref trues to stop him but he flings him to the ground. He stalks over to Scarlett. She turns around to see him and fear passes across her face as she sees what he has in store. She tries to get away but stumbles back and trips over her own feet.

Scarlett has her hands up in front of her as she tries to get away and begs him not to hurt her. Rock throws the chair to the ground and grabs Scarlett by her ankle. She tries desperately to get away and claws at the mats as he drags her to him and hauls her up as roughly as possible by her hair. He slaps her hard which causes her to turn around holding her mouth. She turns to face him again and sees only the chair as it slams into her pretty face. Scarlett goes down hard as the sound of the chair hitting her resonates through the arena. Rock stands over the out-cold Scarlett with a look of anger on his face. He turns to the camera and says, "Next time a woman gets in the ring with the Rock, she's going to get a lot worse than this." He throws the chair down and walks away as his theme song plays.

Posted in Mila Kunis Mixed Wrestling on 2016-11-08 22:14:05

This is a little off-topic but, how do you embed images like that?

Posted in The CW actresses and the gauntlet on 2016-10-28 21:02:41

How do you embed images in the poll questions? I was trying to do that in this poll but it didn't work.

Posted in Christina Hendricks on 2016-10-25 22:06:44

Christina Hendricks had to laugh when the fight commissioner told her who her next opponent was. "A man you say? I'™m supposed to be afraid of a man?"

"Don'™t take this lightly, Christina. He'™ll be bigger and heavier than you, for one thing. And he'™s going to fight. We've, ah taken steps to ensure that he takes you seriously as an opponent."

"Look, Keeley Hazell was a joke. But Toccara Jones and Hilary Scott were real fighters and I beat them. I would have even had Lindsey and Caitlin if they hadn't cheated. So when you tell me that I'™m supposed to take on 'the most average man on the planet' and treat him like he'™s some kind of real fighter, I don'™t know how you can expect to do anything but laugh in your face."

"With us being so selective about our clientele, we have to make sure each match is a good one. We wouldn't have arranged this fight unless we thought it would sell."

"Whatever. As long as I get my cut. Any special stipulations?"

"No. Standard wrestling ring, one fall, no time limit, no holds barred. Fall comes via 10-count pin."

"Alright, then. Sounds good. I'll see you in a week. Just make sure you have my money ready."

"Oh, don'™t worry, honey. Just be ready." The commissioner hung up the phone. As he turned from it, away from it, he smiled. Just the thought that this big titted ginger was going to get a run for her money was enough to make him really look forward to next week.

One week later Christina Hendricks was standing in the ring. She was wearing a green one piece and matching boots. The live audience was small, and shrouded behind the darkness of the shadows cast by the bright overhead lights. No personal cameras or cell phones were allowed into the arena. There was a camera crew recording a tape of the match, which would be sold to a small, carefully vetted audience for an outrageous sum. Christina had already made a lot of money from these matches, since she got a cut of every ticket and every video sold. She had a pretty good record by now, and she wasn't worried about this match. She hadn't met her opponent yet, but the way that he had been described didn't make her concerned. And when he appeared up at the top of the entrance ramp, Christina felt like her lack of concern was justified.

"Ladies and gentleman, now making his way to the ring, standing 5'9" and weighing in at 195 lbs., from parts unknown, he is the most average man in the world: Mr. Average!" He was a pale white guy with a somewhat athletic build and muscle definition, but not exactly an Adonis. He was wearing black shorts and boots and a black mask that covered his whole face and only let his blue eyes shine through. He moved in a stiff, robotic way that seemed to betray a complete lack of athleticism. Christina was pointing and laughing at him. "This is the guy I'™m going to face? What a joke!" She was thinking that she was going to have to drag this out to make this worthwhile.

They met in the center of the ring as the referee explained the rules. Christina looked up into his eyes to try to intimidate him and get his measure. Oddly, though his eyes looked at hers he didn't really seem to truly see her. Maybe he had nerves of steel or something. Christina decided to try another method. After the referee was done, she smiled and cupped her breasts and said, "Hey big boy. Ready to get smothered by some of the most famous $%!@ in the world?" But Average didn't react at all, which caused Christina to have a slightly puzzled look on her face. Then the referee butted and told them that the match was about to start, so they each went back to their corners. Christina bounded back to her corner and did some last minute stretching. Average just stood there and stared into space.

Christina bounds out of her corner and motions for a test of strength. Christina asks, "Come on big boy, think you'™re stronger than me?" Average responds, in a monotone voice, "No," and locks up with her. Christina is shocked by the man'™s strength. He may not be a paragon of masculinity, but he'™s a lot stronger than any of the female opponents that she'™s put away. "I know I am," Average says simply as he presses her down, and a little bit of concern flicks into Christina'™s mind. She'™s helpless as Average handily takes control of her and forces her onto her knees. Then he pulls her back up and maneuvers her into a hammerlock. Christina grunts as he puts pressure on her arm. Her struggles prove futile as she wastes energy trying to wiggle free. Average twists her arm around and maintains his grip on it for leverage to Christina with a big clothesline. The big titted red head hits the floor gasping. Average doesn't give much respite as he bounds off the ropes and hits Christina with an elbow drop right across her huge breasts. Christina cries out and massages her breasts as Average gets up. Average grabs her by her hair and hauls her to her feet. He quickly puts her in a headlock. Christina is again reduced to futilely struggling. This time though, she is able to send two elbows into Average's stomach. Average grunts but maintains his grip. When she tries for it a third time, Average sends a straight punch into the top of her head. "Agghhh!" Christina cries out as she stumbles back into the ropes holding her head. She ends on her $%!@ sitting against the bottom rope. Average walks over to her and again grabs her by the hair to pull her to her feet. He walks her over to the corner and pulls her head back to slam it into the turnbuckle. But Christina manages to put her hands up and stop herself. With a cry of effort, she reverses the move, and Average'™s head slams into the turnbuckle.

He grunts as his head bounces off and he turns around to face his opponent. Christina knows she has to press her advantage, so she starts sending forearms into Average's head and chest. She slaps him hard in the face through his mask. She leans into him so that her breasts press against his moderately firm chest, points her finger into his face and says in a breathy voice, "You'™re gonna pay honey. When I'™m through with yo-AGHHH!" Christina is cut short by Average'™s knee slamming hard into her crotch. She immediately falls to the floor holding her $%!@. She writhes around on the floor crying out. Christina gets it under control enough to get a look at her opponent, and all she sees is Average's charging foot slamming right into her face. "Oooof," Christina was laid out with her body stretched along the floor. She tried to get up several times only to be met with a stomp to the head or chest each time. After four stomps, she stopped trying. As she lay on the floor with a dazed look on her face, she thought 'How am I going to get back into this.'

Average grabbed her left arm, placed one foot on her ribs and one on her head. He grunted with effort and started trying to pull her arm out of her socket. Christina cried out and tried to resist but had no leverage to stop him. Average quit the hold but repositioned himself next to Christina and held her arm out to her side. "No, please-", she begged but it had no effect on him as he raised his knee and slammed it arm. He repeated the move twice and each time she cried out. He let her go and she immediately started massaging her arm. As she whimpered and sobbed, Average moved behind her and sat her up. Average positioned himself behind her and snaked his thighs around the red-head. He had a hard time locking his legs around her wide waist, but once it was cinched in, Christina started hurting. "Aggghhhh!" she said as the pressure started building. She tried to pry his legs apart but they were locked in. After a few moments, Average'™s hands came around, too and he grabbed Christina'™s ample cleavage. Christina shrieked in shock and pain as he dared to touch her in her famous cleavage. He pawed and groped and pinched her ample breasts causing Christina incredible discomfort. "Arrgh! How-how dare you, yo-you bast-aghhhh!" Christina was cut short by him sending a clubbing blow to her right boob. He couldn't get much leverage, but he could get enough to cause pain to her sensitive $%!@. He repeated the move. Then he did to the other boob. Then he started getting into a bit of a rhythm, with Christina crying out each time. Then he clamped onto her boobs harder than ever, and dug his fingers into her titflesh to get more of a grip as he cinched in his body scissors harder than he had yet. Average'™s cry of effort got louder and Christina'™s choked cry of pain got more desperate as the twofold pain in her torso got worse and worse. He started to rock back and pick up Christina'™s body off the ground. Just when she thought that she couldn't take it anymore, Average slammed Christina'™s body back down. Her $%!@ smacked the mat hard and drove all of the air out of her. Average disengaged the hold and untangled himself. Christina had a shocked, pained look on her face as she sat there.

Average stood over Christina and caught his breath before continuing his assault. After a few moments, he grabbed Christina by the hair on her head and slowly hauled her up. He put her in a front face lock, which she weakly tried to get out of as he maneuvered her to the center of the ring. Average hooked her by the bottoms of her one piece and with a bit effort, flipped Christina over in a suplex towards the ropes. Christina arched her back and moaned but didn't move much. Average stepped on either side of her body and again grabbed her by her head. This time Christina fought back a bit and resisted getting to her feet by grabbing onto his hand and trying to pull him down. He maintained his footing though and instead sent a straight punch right into her face. Christina'™s head flew back and briefly grazed the bottom ropes as it came to rest underneath of the rope. Christina massaged her hurt forehead and groaned as Average walked over to her feet. Average grabbed her boots and held them under his armpits. When Christina saw what he was doing, she started begging him not to do it as he moved her body so that her neck was underneath the ropes. When she was in position, Average fell backwards and brought Christina'™s up into the ropes. Her cries of protest were cut short as her neck met the bottom rope. She sputtered and held her throat as she tried to get her breath back. Average grabbed her head again and without much resistance positioned her neck across the middle rope. Then Average grabbed the middle rope as he pressed his body into hers. Christina gasped and sputtered as he used the rope to choke her. Christina could do nothing but struggle ineffectually as the life was choked from her. Just as she started to pass out, Average disengaged the hold and stood up. Christina just stayed there on her knees, splayed out across the ropes trying to catch her breath. 'How could this happen,' she thought. 'I'™m a good fighter, I'™m strong, I've beaten opponents that I was supposed to lose to. But now I'™m being beaten by this punk. And he doesn't seem to have any signs of stopping or slowing down. What am I going to do?'

But the answer, unfortunately for poor Christina, was nothing. Average was looking to end this, which spelled more bad things for Christina. He again hauled her to her feet by her hair. Christina didn't resist, but just groaned as her head was wrenched again. When she was on her feet and facing him, Average punched her in the cheek. Christina grunted, spun around and pitched forward a bit as she held her face. Before she could recover, Average tied Christina up by her neck and thigh and hoisted her onto his shoulders. Christina cried out in surprise as Average positioned her across his shoulders and cinched in the torture rack. Once the hold was in, Christina started freely screaming in pain. Her hair hung freely down as her spine was stretched to its limits. Average started bouncing and pulling on her body to cause maximum pain. For a full two minutes, Christina suffered in the rack, screaming, begging and pleading to be let go. Submissions didn't count here, so her numerous attempts to do so fell on the deaf ears of her opponent and the referee who was standing by at ringside to count pinfalls. Finally when he was ready to let her go, he repositioned her a bit and drove her headfirst into the mat in a driver-type move. Christina's head and neck were slammed into the ring with tremendous force.

Average let her come to a rest and admired his handiwork. The red-head wasn't quite out. Her head lolled from side to side listlessly as her half-open eyes had a glassy look to them. Average thought that she needed a little bit more before his victory was secure. He moved behind her and hooked his arms underneath of hers. He dragged her dead weight to her feet without any resistance and moved to the center of the ring. As she lay limply against him, she managed to say, "Please...please finish me." Average didn't say anything, but simply spun her around and lifted Christina upside down and onto his shoulders. He moved her down so that her face was just below his knees and her legs above his head. She knew exactly what was coming and was powerless to stop it. Average dropped to his knees. As Christina'™s head hit the mat she grunted one last time. He let her body go and it landed unceremoniously with a 'thunk' in front of him. Instead of going for the full Undertaker, he pinned her by pressing his hands into her ample breasts while his crotch rested over her face. The referee came in and performed the 10 count, during which Christina didn't flinch. After she was counted out Average got up as he was announced the winner. As Christina's chest rose and fell to her breathing Average placed his foot on it to punctuate his total dominance of the red-head. The referee raised the masked man'™s hand as the audience cheered him.

The mixed match between Average and Christina Hendricks was the most well received match in the underground league'™s history. Every single client they had bought a copy so they could watch the red-head'™s total domination. Christina herself took a while to recover physically, and even longer mentally. The extra money from the best selling video did nothing to assuage the memory of total defeat. She tried to take a few easier matches but her confidence was so shaken that she lost three fights in a row, all to opponents considered inferior. Christina, who had once been considered one of the stars of the league, was now a laughingstock. She knew that no one took her seriously and that the league was probably thinking about letting her go. Every time she went to bed she saw his stupid masked face before she fell asleep. She needed some kind of absolution and some kind of confidence boost. One day, she couldn't take it anymore. She called up the league commissioner.

"Christina, darling, what can I do for you," he answered.

"Simple. I want a rematch."