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Posted in Do you know your Miranda (Cosgrove) rights? on 2012-05-16 00:28:35

Ahem...here's a little story:

One day, there was a pretty teenage girl named Miranda Cosgrove. She was happily skipping along, down the hall of her high school, humming a merry tune along the way.

She turned the corner, and right there in front of her was the Principal. He asked her, "Excuse me, young lady, but why aren't you in class? I want to see your hall pass."

"I...I don't have it with me right now," she replied. "I just came from the library, where I was dropping off supplies from my art class. I'm on my way there now. It was nice chatting with you, sir."

"Oh, really?" he said, with a sinister grin on his face. "I don't believe you. I've heard about you, Miranda. Your teachers say you're a troublemaker. You don't do your homework, talk out of turn and disrupt the class, you're always late...and your parents tell me you have a fresh mouth and don't listen, and you come home late, after curfew. I think it's about time we straightened you out! Come with me," he said, as he grabbed her arm.

Just then, three more men--the assistant principal, the dean of girls, and Miranda's guidance counselor--rounded the corner. They assisted in dragging her away. "Nooo! Stop, where are you taking me? What are you going to do to me? Ow, you're hurting me!" she cried, as one of the men slightly twisted her arm.

"Oh, this is nothing," the man answered. "Just wait till you see what we have planned for you!"

The three gentlemen escorted Miranda to a secret room in the school, that no one is supposed to know about. The room was empty, except for a single object situated in the exact center. When Miranda saw it, she instinctively knew what it was, even though she'd never seen one before. It was a metal bench, with two supports holding the legs on either end. At each corner were fastened handcuffs, intended to secure a person to it, so that they could not escape. Miranda's eyes instantly bugled out, and she pleaded, "NO! I know what that is! Please don't!"

The principal brought out from behind his back a two-foot long, three-inch thick wooden paddling board. There was an inscription engraved on the side, which read: 'Ole Smokey'. "Please..." begged Miranda. "Don't do this. I promise things will be different. I'll be better."

"It's too late for that now, little miss. I'll tell you what. We can do this the easy way, or the hard way. It's your choice. Do what we tell you, like a good girl, and it will be all over very soon. On the other hand..."

"Wh-what did you have in mind?" she asked, the fear in her voice quite clear. "What's going to happen to me?"

"I want you to take off all your clothes," he replied, with a wide grin.

"No, please...you can't be serious!"

"We told you, Miranda. You had your chance. You want to play games...we can play, too!" he scolded her, as he, with help from the three other guys, started to forcibly strip her naked.

"Nooo! What are you doing? You can't do this! This is child abuse! This is against the law!"

"On the contrary, young lady," he said. "This is perfectly legal. In fact, not only is it allowed, but actually encouraged. Why, didn't you know? There is a new rule in school: All pretty girls must be punished!"

The four men carried the poor girl--against her will, squirming and fighting all the way--over to the bench. They forced her down and made her bend over it. Then they secured her wrists and ankles to the legs with the handcuffs. She lay there, nude and helpless, anticipating what she was sure would be the worst day of her life. But she had no idea just how bad it was to be.

The principal took the paddle, and rubbed it lightly over her rear end, and then tapped it a few times (to get better aim). Miranda started whimpering. "What you are crying for?" he said. "I haven't even touched you yet."

He brought the paddle all the way behind his back...swung with all his might...and slammed it into her bare behind. It made a sound like a sudden thunderclap, signaling a coming rainstorm. It also made Miranda jump. She screamed.

"OWWW!!" It was only the first blow, but Miranda felt as if she were about to faint. Three seconds later, the second blow came--CRACK!

"AHHH! Oh God, no! Please stop! It hurts! It hurts real bad!"

Over about the next six minutes, the men took turns spanking her, and the board continuously pounded into her unprotected body, non-stop. Each slap was louder than the last, as the mounting pain began to overtake her. Soon, her buttocks turned from bright pink to dark red, as she begged and pleaded with the men to put an end to a severe beating, sobbing through her words, and she felt like passing out into unconsciousness.

Eventually, it was over. They released the handcuffs, and helped Miranda up. All she could do was stand there, rubbing her sore bottom, which by now was colored black and blue and covered with bruises and welts. The tears streamed down her face so fast, and her cries filled her ears with such volume, that she could barely see and hear the four men surrounding her, laughing and cheering, congratulating each other on a job well done.

"Now, THAT'S the proper way to spank a pretty teenage girl, right guys?" shouted the principal.

"You said it, buddy!" his friend and the assistant principal, responded. "Did you see that girl's backside shake and turn red when I paddled her? Wow, what a thrill!"

The principal continued, "Now, young lady, have you learned anything here today?"

"Y-y-yes, sir!" she sobbed. "I'll be good now."

The End

Now that you have read this, you are free to post a comment and rate my work. Man, can I write, or what? Heh, heh, heh, heh!

Posted in Reality Shows on 2012-04-27 05:28:16

Reality TV and garbage talk shows (Survivor, Jerry Springer, etc.) are nothing more than the televised version of tabloid rags. It's entertainment junk food, about trailer trash, made by trailer trash, for trailer trash! It provides no useful purpose but satisfying the guilty pleasures of street thugs, welfare tramps, ne'er-do-wells, and other wastes of society with no life!

For crying out loud, jerkface, turn off the idiot box, get off your fat rump, and do something with your life! Try contributing to normal, decent society, instead of leeching off it like a parasite! And I don't want to hear any of your lame excuses! "I'm disabled.", "My family needs me.", "All the good jobs are taken." BULLSH!T. If you have enough energy and time to go shopping for Ding Dongs and Doritos, gabbing with your friends on the phone, and playing video games...you can certainly do other things, too!

I hope Mitt Romney gets elected president. He has promised to clean house and reform the welfare system. The free ride is over! It's time to go to work!

Posted in Trayvon Martin on 2012-04-26 01:17:13

Yes, Dazo, I agree. I'm all for that.

But you forgot one thing. You are probably going to receive a lot of criticism from the NRA (National Rifle Association), and all of their right-wing nuts!

I'm all for disbanding the NRA altogether. In my opinion--and yes, I know this sounds crazy--I think we should eliminate all guns and other firearms from society, period! That means: no military, police, OR private citizens.

Watch the global murder rate go way down!!

Posted in Trayvon Martin on 2012-04-24 23:52:47

Here's an idea: Instead of the media and politicians frivilously wasting money on garbage--like military aircraft to bomb cities and kill innocent civilians in the Middle East--why don't they use those funds to actualy think of ways to stop the youth killings in schools in the first place, instead of "conveniently" looking the other way?

Did you know?...according to a recent report by the ACLU, from 2010 (the last year for which figures are available), federal spending to build prisons is higher than it is to build schools and hospitals...for the first time in our nation's history!

Posted in Seven Deadly Sins, Seven Heavenly Virtues on 2012-04-23 08:22:48

I wrote this poll originally, not because I'm some "Bible-thumping Religious freak"--which I'm not--but rather to get back at all these "crazy, white-hating, minority punks" today, who literally are an infestation; a disease, if you will, on this country.

America today has become nothing more than a non-white, Third World $%!@ hole!

The government let's these people in here, and they bring their whole family over--with their backwards ways and customs, have more babies (yeah, that's all we need, is to bring more of them into the world!)--so they can go on welfare, deal drugs to their pimps, and sell stolen trinkets and rotten vegetables on the street corner. And if they do manage to get a job, it's usually some no-skilled, low-life piece of trash like flipping burgers at McDonald's or sweeping the floor at the local K-mart (cause Lord knows they're too stupid to do anything else, due to the fact that 99% of them don't even want to learn how to speak English!), and then they manage, after several years, to save up a few dollars--so they can send money to their damn foreign country and bring over the rest of them!

Meanwhile, us decent, hard-working White Americans are the ones who have to suffer. Because if we complain, or cry out, "I'm proud of who I am!", or, "We need to preserve the future of our people!", then we're automatically branded as 'typical racists'. And you know who's to blame for all of this? The media, government and so-called 'bleeding-heart liberal nutjobs', who want to use past injustices and the reparation movement as an excuse to hate and practice reverse discrimination.

It seems to be cool in society today to hate anything white, and not just the people. I mean hockey, rock music, a Rolls Royce automobile, a Steak and Lobster dinner, etc. Well, we say, "Enough is enough!" It's time to END WHITE GENOCIDE NOW!! Long live the Aryan Nation! Go back to the freak farm, where your kind belongs! And take the stinking faggots, retards, oversized hippo whales, the tree-hugging weirdos, and the sympathizers with you! This is our country, and our time! Ha ha, take that...boy!

That's why I wrote this poll! To show that these people have no morals!