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Parenting and Spanking

Which parent

Posted by radleyradley on 2017-01-12 11:53:34

Should Mums spank sons and should dads spank daughters? What do you think? Please take my new poll

http://www.misterpoll.com/polls/617178

Have fun

Radley

Posted by madisonnnn on 2017-08-19 21:20:56

I'm a girl and get all mine from my dad. My mom doesn't spank me anymore.

Posted by R.J. on 2017-08-23 17:02:47

Hi Madison,

Read your other message too regarding being too old at 14. First of all, 14 is not too old to be spanked if your behavior deserves some punishment. At your age, and you say your older brother too, are old enough to know better than act out as you say you have to earn these spankings...sneaking out at night; disrespectful back-talking; poor grades. There is nothing that comes to my parental mind that could ever justify a 14 y/o to need to sneak out of the house at night. If you have to sneak out then you apparently know what you are doing or where you are going wouldn't have parent's approval. In a teenager, disrespectful attitude & back-talking might be natural teen transitional behavior from being a child into seeking young adulthood, but that still doesn't justify and parents need to correct that behavior. Punished over grades can be determined if you are neglecting assignment & getting poor grades & be justified or do you just need tutoring/assistance to comprehend better. If you need help with your studies, talk to your parents & ask for help.

Maybe you should've been corrected more when younger & then wouldn't need it so much more now as you claim. I do feel it might be better as a 14 y/o girl if your mom, rather than dad, was doing the spanking. The same gender when a teenager, is less likely to bring on embarrassment when punished & embarrassment shouldn't be a factor in punishing. I'm sure your mom could still give your bottom an impressive spanking if you need one...if not with her hand, I'm sure she could find something to bring home the corrective message you might need. That said, for your older brother it is dad who should be tanning his butt when he needs such correction.

Posted by madisonnnn on 2017-08-24 12:55:51

Hi R.J. I just think at 14 that I'm too old for spankings. They are for little kids and I'm not a little kid anymore. My dad does them cause he says its part of his job as my father to give out punishments. Omg yes it is embarrassing getting them cause well you know, I'm naked below my waist. I've actually told him that it is embarrassing but he told me feeling shame is kart if the punishment and feeling embarrassed are the same thing and that I should feel shame. Thats why I have to do corner time too after a spanking. I know sneaking out was wrong but we weren't doing anything bad, I just had to go talk to my friends about some things to help my one friend who was upset. I do try at school but yeah I don't always get good grades but I don't think I deserve a spanking for that. I am trying. Yeah sometimes i dont study when I'm supposed to but I do what I can, sometimes I get caught up in simethimg else and run out of time to finish studying. I'm sorry about that but some things are more important. I normally try to do goidbut sometimes I mess up and get punished for it but I really do try. I don't a spanking over my bottom is needed and not corner time either. I think its too strict.

Posted by R.J. on 2017-08-29 16:54:04

Madison, I might agree that 14 is too old to be spanked, but at 14, you too should know better than to behave as you say you have when spanked. Both parents have a role & responsibility in raising a child and both should be capable of administering a punishment. Punishment can take different forms based on age, offense, gender & primarily a parent's impression of what is effective and needed. As a dad, I might be a bit uncomfortable with a 14 y/o daughter if spanking bare bottom and it might be also embarrassing/uncomfortable for the daughter. That said, a boy at 14 might not object as much, though he still might not like the idea of being spanked, to lowering his trousers and shorts in front of dad while embarrassed to be bare butt for mom. If your mom spanked you previously as a younger girl, it might then be better she still be the one to do it at 14.

You admit sneaking out at night is wrong. Maybe you are just not mature enough at 14 to know the risks that such behavior poses. Parents must maintain control out of care for your well being, until you show behavior that is mature and responsible. You can meet & talk with friends at school or appropriately in other open daylight hours. The fact you sneak says your motives are suspicious. Nothing should come ahead of your study time for school at 14. There is no excuse for not having time to do with care your school work assignments. If something has to be sacrificed because of time, it should be your other social activities.

Respect your parents and be grateful for them. I have young clients who would feel lucky if they had parents growing up who cared about them and their future. Parents are strict when you force their hand to be strict...that is just part of parenting. You get your behavior and priorities in order & parents might feel it is time to slacken up on rules & discipline.