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Punishments in family

disciplined mom/mil

Posted by Sally3 on 2015-06-11 16:46:25

Even before my oldest daughter got married and moved to her own home, she had taken charge of me and her younger sisters. She kept strict order and discipline since I could not handle my responsibilities according to her. She moved me out of the master bedroom into her old room and took over the larger space for herself. All of us got spanked, but me most often and hardest. At least weekly she thrashed me with a switch, strap, paddle, or cane, sometimes all of them in turn. She sent me to bed with no supper when i was naughty after putting me in the corner to display my fresh stripes and bruises.

I recently moved in with my daughter and her husband (for financial reasons). I'm dependent on them and I have to obey them. As a condition of living with them, I have clear rules and consequences for breaking them. They both spank me, She is still in charge of me and my discipline day-to-day. She puts me over her knee and spanks my bare bottom on the spot for any little fault. He administers the cane when needed. or when my daughter asks him to. It means that my son-in-law, who is very strict, canes me hard when I break a rule, puts me in the corner of the living room with my freshly spanked bare bottom on display, grounds me, sends me to bed early, and gives me extra chores. Sometimes he adds a plug of peeled ginger or soap sticks or mouthsoaping to increase my discomfort and humiliation. He is even stricter with me since he blames his wife's faults on my lax parenting and also says I need severer punishment since I am older and should know better.

My daughter is in charge of what I wear, eat, who I see, supervising my chores, and other things. She administers day-to-day discipline (over her knee with a hairbrush or lexan paddle and corner time) but my son-in-law gives me more serious punishments in the living room. He requires me to strip naked for the cane and corner time even if other family or friends are watching. Are there other moms and MILs out there who are treated like this?

Posted by quest11 on 2015-06-13 06:48:05

You must be very obedient mom then

Posted by elsa_johanni on 2015-06-24 18:33:40

Sally, your story is very much as my own though there also a big differences. My oldest daughter took charge of me and her younger sister when and took the role as the responsible adult and maternal figure in the house already when she was 17. She was tired of my immature and irresponsible behaviour, my many bad habits and of me constantly letting my daughters down. Many times she already had helped me out of problems and for instance negotiating with the bank and other creditors when I had been partying or bought smart clothes so that we had no money for the rest of the month. When I once more came home tired and a little drunk after staying out all night she presented me with the ultimatum that either I turned all authority over to her, gave her power of attorney to handle our finances, handed over to her my money, credit- and debit cards, keys and cellphone and accepted to her rules and submitted to discipline by her or she would refuse to help me and would move out the moment she turned 18. This came as a shock to me and I tried hard to change her mind but she was hard as stone and would not negotiate at all. I tried sweet talking and crying and – as so many times before – to promise that I in future would be a good and responsible mother but she wanted my complete and unconditioned surrender and she told me straight out that I was only an overgrown child, mentally no older than 13 or 14, totally irresponsible and also promiscuous and naughty. The only reason she offered to give me a chance and straighten things out was that she owed it to her sister who needed a family life with order and security and proper care. And I needed the same plus a firm hand to keep me in line. It was hard for me to hear this especially because deep down I knew that it was true what she said and because my conscience often troubled me though I was able to forget it and be as carefree and flippant as ever as soon as a new temptation presented itself and I could continue my irresponsible ways. I am not sure that I would have accepted my daughter's ultimatum if I had not been tired and far from sober but after hours of begging and pleading I finally surrender, signed the papers she had ready, handed over money and cards and keys got a severe spanking with her wooden hairbrush and was put to bed until next morning. Next day my daughter went through my wardrobe and confiscated all items that in her opinion were indecent and improper. She presented me with a set of strict rules to obey in future. She moved me out of the parental bedroom and into the smallest bedroom in the house and she informed me that though I was the oldest in the house I was also the most immature so in future I would in all ways be treated as the little naughty girl I was. I would be subject to strict rules and restrictions including curfew and a set bedtime, limitations on TV, Internet, reading and use of the phone. I would be supposed to do exactly as I was told and to ask for permission for everything. I would be controlled and checked on and have very narrow boundaries and when I in any way relapsed to my naughty ways I would be punished. From then on my life has changed completely and I have to admit that the change has been for the better. It is not nearly as fun and festive as before but it is a good life with order and security and regularity and not all the worries and sorrows I used to have. I am free of all adult worries and my daughter has always run the household smoothly with a firm hand. She is very strict especially with me but also with her seven years younger sister and especially to begin with I had big problems submitting and adjusting to my daughter's firm regime but she is very competent and and I admire and look up to her. And she not only is strict but also loving and caring so I have learned that even when she spanks the tar out of me and grounds me it is because she loves me and cares for me and wants to protect me from my own immaturity and inherent naughtiness. The best thing about all this is of course that since my oldest daughter took charge my youngest daughter has had a good with the order and love and care that she needed and that I was too childish and selfish to give her. Unlike your daughter my daughter has not married and moved out. She is a lesbian and is now living with another girl. They were close childhood friends and met again when studying and then they decided to live together. This means that the last 2 years there have been two adult women to take care of my youngest daughter and me. They now both have graduated from university and have got good jobs but stay in our house. We are an unusual but very well-functioning and happy family and though I often pout and sulk when I am not allowed to do something or have to do boring chores I must admit that my daughter did right when she took charge and in reality became my guardian and disciplinarian. If you want to discuss this with me and exchange experiences you are welcome to write. My email is elsa_johanni@yahoo.com

Posted by Sally3 on 2015-06-25 17:12:06

Hi elsa,

Yes we do have a lot in common. My daughter is married but she took charge well before then. I think i was in the same state you were when i was faced with the fateful ultimatum from my daughter. i also had to hand everything over, like keys, money, cards and a power of attorney giving her control of all the finances. Most of my clothes were confiscated and i was placed under strict supervision. i also had the same vices as you and was put under strict control to curb them, which are still in effect. My daughter is a lot like yours too, it sounds like.

Like you, in spite of some sulking and rebelliousness (which is not tolerated), i came to feel safe and secure and kind of at peace like a child, knowing someone was in charge. Things have run better ever since, so i accept all the pain and humiliation i must suffer as i try to mend my ways and grow up at least a bit, years after i should have.

Thanks for the addy. i wrote you.

sally (sally384@gmx.com)

Posted by rr28 on 2015-09-15 01:28:13

I sincerely hope these are fantasy posts. It is sick and perverse for a child to punish his/her own parents that brought them into the world, clothed them, fed them, and taught them everything they know. Older parents may need their children to support and take care of them, but that should NEVER involve punishing them.

It's an upside down world we live in. I just went out and listened to children allowed to order at a fast food restaurant and practically demand their order from the clerk, no please's, thank you's or ma'am's at all. What a bunch of self-centered little brats. Too bad they will never be made to learn respect for anyone besides themselves. I may not be the best son but I would never even think of hitting one of my parents. Sorry but children that discipline a parent are disgusting. Go try and tell a police officer he is under arrest, and see how that works out...yet this is even worse because police have no legitimate God-given authority, parents have legitimate God-given authority and its a commandment to honor your parents.