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Diaper punishment for constipation/holding on when they know they need to go.

Advice please!

Posted by eff51 on 2014-08-15 01:25:12

We currently let our daughter use the toilet after an enema or supp but it isn't changing her behaviour. I wondered if we should start punishing her like making her poo in a diaper. How long should I leave her in a messy diaper if I do? Do I make her pee in it whilst she has the diaper on?

Posted by SUZI_F on 2014-08-23 17:02:25


I'm the mother of a chronic habitual witholder (still doing it at nearly 11 years old). Check out my message history/polls if you haven't already.

I don't really see the point of diaper punishment - but that's because in my mind the enema or suppository is punishment enough. Spanking prior to the $%!@ insertion is a good idea though.

The usual rules are: Enema, hold for at least ten minutes and then hold until the next intense urge - Suppository (if over the age of about three!), hold at least ten minutes and...etc

It's possible to save a bit of money by using soap suppositories (make sure the soap contains no artificial perfumes and no detergent: either plain unscented soap, e.g "simple", or, for better results, glycerine soap).

Posted by BW55 on 2014-08-26 03:29:02

I think the OP means they have tried that but it isn't working and want to go more extreme.

As for my daughter (also 5) we had the same problem. Ours holds her pee until the last moment as well as holding poop and sometimes wets herself because of holding it too long despite knowing exactly when she needs to go.

We started trying solutions about 3 months ago. Our first time was this time we went to the swimming pool. We got changed and showered and then I asked her if she needed a poo. She said no but I knew she did. Knowing this would be the response I had packed some suppositories and a pack of swim nappies. I got her swimsuit off and then gave here a hard spanking. (A wet bum hurts more so that's why I got her to have a shower first.) I then shoved 2 dulcolax up her bum and put on the swim nappy and her swimsuit again and her armbands to help her learn to swim. We then got in the pool. We were in the queue for the water slide when I noticed the supps doing their job. She started squirming and then squatted and a firm lump appeared in the back of her swimsuit. This made her cry a little and when we got to our turn on the slide she had to sit down and squish it. We took of her messy nappy when we got out the pool when I also lectured her about if she went when she needed to she wouldn't have accidents like this. After that we went to the doctor and he prescribed some oral laxatives. We have got the dosage just right so that if she goes when she needs to then everything is fine but if she tries to hold it for more than 15 minutes then she usually has an accident. She hates having accidents. We also put her back in pull ups or swim nappies 24/7 including at school. We told her that when she is a big girl and goes when she needs to then she can have her big girl pants back. This also helps with her wetting and teaches her to pee when she needs to.

If she hasn't been before she is taken to the toilet after dinner to do a poo. We have a 30 minute egg timer which is how long she has to go. She sits on the toilet until she either does a poo or the timer runs out, whichever happens first. If the timer runs out then I spank her and get 2 dulcolax supps and coat them in ginger. I then shove them up her bum and let her play. I make sure she does the resulting poo in her pull ups which she then has to wear until bed time. If she goes to the toilet in that time I tell her not to bother wiping as she is going to be putting on a dirty pull up again.

Posted by HeightsMom on 2014-09-13 05:09:16

I do not think diaper punishment would help here. I agree with BW55's approach of setting a time when she must have used the toilet or or be punished. If she hasn't pooped by the appointed time, put her on the toilet and set a timer. If time runs out without results, PADDLE HER BARE BUTT, including her "sit spot" and upper thighs. Then give her an enema. Before sitting her back on the toilet, give a few refresher swats so that sitting on the seat will be uncomfortable. Do this every day until she learns.

Posted by laylagirl on 2014-11-07 20:37:38

Mine were taken into the bathroom where I would pull their pants down and put them on the toilet (potty when younger) and they had to stay there until they did a poo. They were checked after half an hour and if they hadn't done anything it was spanking time and back on the toilet or potty for another half hour. They soon learned to make sure they did a poo