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Parents using tickle punishment

You're going to get a tickling...

Posted by pollye on 2005-10-11 01:34:18

You’re going to get a tickling…is the words our children hear when they have done something that deserves punishment. We have 5 children and have found tickling to be much more effective than spanking. I found this poll as a result of trying to see if other are using and have found tickling to be an effective punishment. We know it is being used in some orphanages in other parts of the world as a replacement for whipping or spanking. I have found tickling to have all the few positive benefits of spanking without any of the negative effects and without the guilt. We have developed a ritualized system that hold our children to account for their deportment. They are held to account for disobedience, deceit and attitude appropriate to their age. When there is an issue we have a family meeting or family court. The issue is discussed and the accused child can offer their defense or simply apologize and accept their fate. Our family in effects votes upon the outcome and I am always amazed how the kids don’t accept excuses very well which is why the child accused often accepts their fate without argument. Punishment is tickling with a range of time from 10 minutes and up and as a family we come to an agreement upon the time. My husband and I have the final say in any event. The child to be punished is taken to the bathroom. This is usually done by myself and they are prepared for being punished which usually includes a bath. We have a guest bedroom that has a double bed and a hospital bed. While the child to be punished is being prepared the other family members assemble in the guest bedroom. The child to be punished is taken to the guest bedroom naked and secured to the hospital bed with medical restraints. Arms, thighs and ankles. A bolster is placed under the ankles to prevent the feet from being turned down towards the mattress to escape tickling. Another bolster is placed under the small of the back to compensate for the sag in the mattress. This in combination with the thigh restraints makes twisting about almost impossible and keeps the skin stretched over the ribs. We set a kitchen timer for the required amount of time. Each of the other children can assist with the punishment. They may tickle only with 2 fingers at a time anywhere they want. They give their sibling a kiss on the cheek or forehead and usually tell them where they are going to tickle them. I give the last kiss and then start the tickling. I am not limited to using just 2 fingers. All tickling is with fingers only. I know where my kids are most ticklish so I make sure that the tickling is intense enough that there is a real element of punishment. My husband usually does very little tickling if any but keep on eye on vital signs including a pulse oximeter attached to one of the fingers. When the punishment is over the child is released, held, cuddled, hugged and kissed. If they want they will be allowed to sleep in our bed that night and they usually choose to do that. We require a certain amount of cooperation by our children when they are summoned to family court. We do not take our children into the guest bedroom kicking and screaming and struggling to avoid be placed in restraints for tickling. They are lead from the bathroom to the guest bedroom with a gentle guiding hand upon their back or waist and they are expected to get up on the bed and remain still as the restraints are attached and adjusted. If at any time anyone of our children chooses to not cooperate within our family to our ritual of dealing with deportment issues they will be subject to being given a spanking. All of our children at one time or another have had a spanking with a hairbrush on their bare bottom. Not just a couple of swats but enough to turn their bottom red and produce lots of tears. Three of our children have had 2 spanking. One of the 3 has had a 3rd spanking. There have been no spankings for over a year. We believe tickling to be a very cultured and civilized way to administer punishment that is loving, effective and fun . Well not quite as much fun for the ticklee. My 8 year old son was talking to me right after being tickled recently and he told me he though he was going to faint right after the tickling started. He was being punished for lying. He then went on to explain he was glad he did not faint because he knew he deserved to be punished. My 7 year old daughter loves that her brothers must give her a kiss. One might question just how effective this can be as punishment. I believe it is important that all the siblings participate in administering the tickling. This is how it is done in the orphanages for example. Having a voice in the decision to punish and to then participate in administering the punishment is fun for the other siblings. For the one being punished it is stressful over a long period of time and as they get older we also see increasing degrees of shame. Not from being naked but just because they must suffer the process which included having to admit wrong doing and being judged by younger siblings. We impose no other punishment. No one is ever grounded, given extra chores ect. As long as they participate properly in the process the most that will happen regardless of what they do or don’t do is they will be tickled and will be the center of attention for at least an hour or so. I am always amazed at how fair the children are when judging and coming to a decision about the length of punishment. However, while waiting for their sibling to be prepared for punishment they plot among themselves how to best tickle their sibling to cause the most suffering. Perhaps of interest our children are home schooled. Also I would be interested in the experience of others especially any negative issue as the children get older.

Posted by wednesday on 2005-10-15 02:26:26

I think you are a good mom. I think you are like my mom. I love my mom and daddy. They have rules for me. I know i must have rules. If I don follw the rules mom and daddy talk to me. They don’t get mad but sometime they will tell me like you tell your kids that I am to get tickled. Mostly I am good. When I take my bath and mom will talk to me about the rules. Sometime I cry because i feel bad. Mom hug me. In our basement there is a tickle table. Daddy made the table it in a small room thats warm. Mom takes me to the basement she holds my hand. The basement is cool and the floor is really really cool. I dont have any cloths and I am barefoot. I am happy to get in the room where the tickle table is. There is carpet on the floor to and daddy has the heat turned on. I have to get up on the table. Daddy helps me cauge it high. Daddy tie me and mom talks to me an kiss me. I am a little scared but I know that I need be punished. Mom tickle my tummy slow in the begining then more then my feet. I can stand it when my feet are tickle. Mom has pretty white nails and she tickle both feet at one with her nail. Daddy has tied my feet so I cant move them and she wont stop. Daddy tickle my under arm. I laugh so much and I cant talk. Sometime i pee and cant help it. Mom and daddy dont get mad I get more kiss and hugs. I think it really nice that you let your kids sleep with you after tickling. I am allowed to do that to. Sometime I get tickled a little more in bed and then mom always give me a nice back rub. My friends all get grounded for weeks sometimes. A few even get spanked. I tell them my parents talk to me and hug and kiss and they never hurt me. I love my parents and I try to follow the rules.

Posted by pollye on 2005-10-15 14:21:05

Thanks for your post. It is really sweet and what a clever screen name. Are you an Adams Family Fan? I am a big fan of the Adams Family and especially Christina Ricci as Wednesday Adams. I am going to guess you are around 10 years old. Don’t tell me especially if you are not 13 or older or don’t want to. I would like to ask you a couple of questions if you don’t mind. I don’t want you to answer them if you don’t want to.
Did your parents ever spank you? Sounds like when you get punished it is at bedtime after your bath. It that right? Can you tell me why you are scared?
Is it because you are going to be tickled?
I want to tell you something.
Not often but my kids also will sometimes pee when they are being tickled. Not very often but it does happen and it’s ok and I am sure your parents have told you it ok. Polly

Posted by wednesday on 2005-10-15 23:11:00

Yes I am a adams family fan. I watch it on Tvland. Mom says I look like Wednesday from the tv program. I guess I better not tell my age. But your guess is good.
I got spanked when I was younger before. Not since 1st grade I think. Now I just get tickle. I don’t pee often either. Daddy put a pad on the table in case I do. Its embarrassing but I cant help it. I don’t even know when I do it usually it just happens. After mom takes me to the bathroom and washes me. I always get punished at bed time after my bath. I get to stay up a little later and after mom takes me to her bed room so I can sleep with them. I don’t tell my friend that I sleep with them they would think I am a baby or wiered bu I like to. Its when I am being tied down I get scared. I know I have to be tied. Mom use to hold me on her lap and tickle bit I got to strong and even mom and daddy both could not hold me I would squirm away. They were afraid I might hurt myself so now I am tied. It take a long time. My arms are above my head and I cant see what being done. Daddy wrap something around my arms all the way down my arms past my elbows and it attached to the table. My feet are tied and that takes a ahile but not as long as my arms. It sometime tickles while he is tying my feet. I cant move and see very much cant look around to good either. If I lift my head to look around my neck hurts. Mom tell me to put my head down and just relax. The room is almost dark anyway. Mom talks to me and touches me and kisses me and that make me feel a little better but I guess because I cant move and I keep thinking about what it is going to be like when the tickling starts. When mom daddy would hold me and tickle me which they still do sometime just to tease me sometimes I can usually get free. If they are tickling my foot I can twist and kick and get free. They get me again but I got a little break. When I being punished and am tied to the table I can get a break. Mom and daddy told me I not suppose to get break.

Posted by pollye on 2005-10-16 14:05:43

Wednesday, your answers to my questions were such a delight. However I am afraid your parents are right. When you are being tickled for punishment you don’t get a “break”. That’s what makes it punishment! When your parents are tickling you for fun or to just tease you a little they expect to let you have little breaks. I bet you even come back for more. My kids do. I have a 10 year old daughter that would be interested in an e-mail pen pal. If you have interest make one more post to let me know & I will arrange a temporary e-mail address for you to contact her with if you wish.