poll #1 today, now, today

I just left a rather lengthy message about this on another board, but I'll put it short and sweet here.

Until I was 14 I believed completely in God according to Roman Catholicism. Then I began to seriously examine my beliefs and I decided that perhaps another religion was right for me. I even tried out some Wiccan rituals. Then it occurred to me that I didn't have to pick between one religion or another. In trying to reconcile what I'd been told about history and Jesus with science and 'reality,' I came to believe less and less in the patriarchal god of the Bible. Then that god was simply the life force through which everything in the universe operated. Then began the very painful process of admitting to myself that I didn't honestly feel that there was a 'higher power' behind the creation/operations of the universe. Neither, however, do I believe firmly that those who do believe are wrong; anything is possible, but I don't personally feel that it has any bearing on our lives.

I'm 18 now, and it's still uncomfortable for me to tell other people that I don't believe. I still go to church with my mother.