Fathers who still spank their adult sons regardless of age (FATHERS ONLY!)
Any male ca. 16 and up who receives corporal punishment needs something that stings with truly serious pain if such punishment is going to remain effective for him. Years ago I determined that what had been good for me as a boy might remain good for me as a man and got myself a punishment strap made of black neoprene rubber about 3 1/2" wide, about 1/8" thick and about 15" long and with a wooden handle to help the person administering the punishment to control the strap.
I had a friend who, like me, as using corporal punishment with his youngsters and who agreed with me that perhaps this experience could be helpful for us AND that if we had done something we thought called for it, we should be "man" enough to ask each other for as much of the strap as it would take to help make us VERY SORRY for what we'd done.
After the strap arrived, we got together one day at the other guys house when his wife was not there and "practiced" with two layers of bubble-wrap tied securely around our behinds. You could feel some pressure when it licked you, but there was no pain. We decided to cut the strap down to 12", at which point we felt we'd be able to control it enough and to make it really "work."
The word was, too, that the rubber would sting even worse if you rubbed a light coat of baby oil or vasoline around your behind. I must assume that this advice was correct; at least, it certainly did not make that strap ineffective!!
The day came when I very unlovingly sassed off my wife and felt I needed to ask my friend for a good dose of the strap. I did apologize to her, and loving wife that she is, she forgave me. I did not tell her, however, how I was also going to "pay my price" for what I did, but that following week-end, when she and my kids were away for the day, I asked my friend to stop by the house and give me what I deserved for mouthing off to my wife like I'd done.
We'd agreed that we would bend over the back of a chair, like we both had to do when we were teen-agers. He had begun to punish his teen-age boy in the same position, so he was "experienced" in licking it on in that position. (My youngsters were not yet that old.) So when he got to the house, we went in our bed-room, I stripped down to an athletic supporter, which is how I always got it from my dad, rubbed my behind with vasoline, and told him to give it to me until he was convinced I'd had enough and not to stop until such point.
It was incredibly horrible!!!! At least as bad as anything I ever got from my dad!!! It only took about a half dozen licks until I could not keep quiet, and after a while I was yelling and finally crying like a teen-ager. He told me some days later that he gave me 25 licks with that strap, and believe me, it was as horrible as anything I can remember ever getting from my dad.
It did the job! I've never felt the need to ask for it again, though I am firmly convinced that its existence in my house is helpful. I did lick my friend on two occasions, and in both cases, he also ended up crying like a teen-age boy.
I doubt that a paddle, even a lexan paddle, would hurt that bad, partly because it does not curl around your behind like this rubber strap does. By the time it's over, your entire behind is red and hurts like you can't believe from one side to the other and from "top to bottom." The total square inches of fiery pain you get far exceeds what a paddle would ever do to you. And just as bad: you get 3 1/2" x ca. 8 or 9", thus ca. 27 or 30 square inches of incredibly hideous sting each time the strap licks you!!!
My friend was so "taken" by the experience that he got a thick rubber paddle from the Hanson firm to start using on his teen-age boy, there again able to spread the licks around and thus to cover the entire behind with pain so fiery and to effect the kind of anguish that so bad that there is no doubt that the punishment has taken effect. He does NOT use a rubber strap on his boy, but the rubber paddle he uses has a blade of about 3" x 6" or about 18 square inches of sting as of each lick, and he told me that when he tried it on himself before starting to use it with his boy, he could not go beyond about 7 or 8 licks because the pain had become so fiery that he could no longer stand it. He said that the boy's age plus one is more than enough licks to make his son also very sorry for what he did that deserved such punishment.
So my own experience, receiving the strap one time and delivering it to my friend two times, makes clear that it "gets to you" in adult years in the same way it needs to "get to" a boy, if corporal punishment is going to "work" for him.
It may not be for everyone, but for my friend and me, it's been incredibly effective and useful. I think we are both better husbands and fathers and citizens because we are ready to "support" each other even this way if it seems called for.
I have a friend at work who got is boy a rubber paddle like the one described when the boy turned 13. He says it makes him start crying almost right away and that in not time at all he's crying very hard. My friend also tried it on himself and apparently with the same fiery results in the message above. He uses the same system: one lick for each year of the boy's age "plus one to grow." One would wonder if there is anything better to use than one of those rubber paddles, given how it is safer than a hard paddle, small to control, but apparently with VERY ugly, fiery sting that makes it very effective.
I used a paddle made of 1/4" lexan and equipped with 13 holes to make the sting even more fiery. It gave my boys exactly what they needed when corporal punishment was called for.
However, I was always concerned about injury, esp. broken bones. So if were starting out all over again, I would probably use one of the new-style thick rubber paddles described here (above). It helps to make it hurt bad enough to make the boy cry pretty bad by the time he has half of the licks you're going to give him, and I take it that a rubber paddle can hurt at least that bad and maybe worse. It may be that a thick rubber paddle is the best thing you can use AND that it can hurt enough to give a teen-ager what he needs, which means you can keep using the same thing from little on up until he no longer needs that kind of punishment.
I have never used the over-the-knee position, but a rubber paddle would be perfect for a boy in that position, and even a high school boy could be required to go across your knee for a good dose of a rubber paddle that would give him what he needs.
I'm glad my days of administering corporal punishment are over!
25 or 30 good, hard licks with a short, thick rubber paddle, spread all around the behind, would make any adult son very sorry for his misdeed. The rubber paddle would be a lot easier to use and to control, compared with a rubber strap, though if you did it right, the strap could be made to curl the whole way around the behind, making each lick worse than any given lick with the rubber paddle.
I find a rubber strap to be most useful when punishing my son. It's flexibility is a bonus when a quick "smack" to his bare legs is required (shorts are worn at home!) also, for more serious attention, I find the strap does certainly curl around the behind to give a fuller coverage. To acheive a good blow one needs to be standing to the bending young man's side but not too close, rather in line with his upper torso than right over his bottom. Soon this 20 year old is as tearful as a baby and attitude adjustment is well and truly acheived.